You've Seen Me

"If it comes in a role I’m not going to say, ‘No shirtless scenes’." [x]




Let me first say this:

  • Arya Stark is a traumatized preteen on the run for her life who has faced threats of sexual abuse and is being trained as an assassin.
  • Sansa Stark is a traumatized teenage girl at the mercy of a malicious, overgrown, pedophiliac man child who’s basically responsible for the War of the Five Kings.

They are both suffering more than anybody, let alone two orphaned little girls, ever should and the struggles they go through after their father’s death cannot be minimized in any way.

But that being said, I want to discuss their portrayal more under the cut.

I definitely think that the narrative favors Arya more than it does Sansa in AGOT which sets up their arcs in the series. Prior to Arya being understandably traumatized by her status as a child on the run during a war, she was given nothing to really regret doing, or nothing the reader could blame her for. She was insecure yes, and faced massive issues with the rigid gender roles of Westerosi society, but those are societal issues to be corrected, not character flaws in Arya. In fact, I think Arya’s story is more about how much the world is unfair, more than about how Arya as a character responds to the world being unfair and has to account for her own character flaws.

Sansa at the beginning, is naive, admittedly shallow, spends a lot of time in her own head telling stories about handsome princes and jousts, enjoys “princessy” classically feminine activities like sewing, and has a tendency to trust absolutely terrible people, which is why she runs to Cersei when she learns Ned plans to take them away. Arya on the other hand, is capable of seeing through the facade Joffrey and Cersei put on, she is extroverted and enjoys spending time with everybody from small folk to her bastard brother, and she’s a tomboy; she likes classically “male” activities like sword fighting and doesn’t mind getting dirty and roughing it, even if she distinctly identifies as female. 

I’m not saying that GRRM is being intentionally sexist with his portrayal of Arya and Sansa, but the fact that the “feminine” character is given (very understandable) character flaws that need to be shed in order for her to survive and thrive and the more “tomboyish” character is perfect the way she is but the world is shit for not accepting her uniqueness is just a bit… discomforting to me. This all is probably because of my own character biases  and the fact I have a very hard time relating to Arya because of major personality differences but the fact is that she makes no real mistakes in the narrative; threatening Joffrey doesn’t count because Joffrey is an awful person and Cersei is very clearly responsible for Lady’s death and Sandor/Cersei for Micah’s and even if Arya blames herself, there’s no way the reader is ever going to as they do Sansa. 

So I almost understand why Sansa was so much more hated than Arya outside of Tumblr for the longest time. I don’t think they were handled with an even hand, and to be honest, the same goes for a lot of other “two sides of the coin” in the novels, characters who go through similar arcs or hold similar roles in the series. If we take Ned/Catelyn, Jaime/Cersei, Cersei/Tyrion, Jon/Dany, in all four of those pairs, there is one character that faces much more criticism and in all four cases, it’s the woman. For instance, Cersei and Tyrion are two sides of the sexism/ableism intersectionality debate but we don’t get Cersei’s perspective until her son’s been murdered in front of her and father’s been murdered by her brother. Tyrion murders a sex worker and his father in ASOS so what if we didn’t get his perspective until ADWD? Would he be as likable? I doubt it. 

But anyway, I think this is more an issue with the author instead of the character themselves. It’s sort of a very nit picky thing but it’s been bothering me for a while so have at it.


I don’t deny that’s a good point, and I do think Arya was written to be immediately more sympathetic than Sansa. But I also think that was a conscious narrative choice, that I personally liked.

Arya is a sympathetic character in AGOT, and easier to relate to than Sansa. But the plot drives Arya into becomind hardened, and although she keeps her basic personality intact (loyal, brave, generally moral and kind), it becomes a lot harder to relate to her as she turns into a murderer and trains to become an assassin. It’s interesting to follow her plot, and you still sympathize with her and feel for her, but it’s harder to relate to a child soldier than it is to a carefree girl.

Sansa, on the other hand, becomes more relatable than she was. She becomes kinder and more self-aware. She sees the world as it is, finally, and it’s when she suffers that she starts to think about some of our other favorite characters with kindness (Arya, Jon, etc). She’s always been kind, but it’s as she suffers that we see it more clearly. And I truly believe that was a narrative choice, to make Arya harder to relate to and Sansa easier to relate to. To switch their parts that way, so to speak.

I’m not explaining everything away though, because I think GRRM isn’t perfect in his choices of writing typically feminine characters, but I genuinely think it’s interesting the way he chose to develop Sansa and Arya.


Game of Thrones Season 1-3 Honest Trailer


That kid hates my guts, despises me.

You and me chasing paper
Getting nowhere
On our way back home

❝ Five words: Kit Harington’s big brown eyes. ❞
John Bradley-West (Samwell Tarly) on his favorite thing about being a part of Game of Thrones.  (via winteriscoming-eventually)

Edward Norton in American History X (1998)

You’ve seen me.

and you’ve seen me.

I contemplate the moment in the garden, the idea of allowing your own crucifixion.

We don’t give that up.

I know who I am. And after all these years, there’s a victory in that.


'True Detective' 16”x11”

You, yourself – it’s all a big drama. It was never anything but a jerry rigged presumption and dumb will. And you could just let go! To finally know that you didn’t have to hold on so tight…